What Is Mirroring? Psychology, Types, and Enneagram Insights

In essence, mirroring is the act of mimicking someone else's body language. It is an innate social behavior, and although it is universal, each person's motivation for using it differs.

This is where the Enneagram test is practical; it helps us understand what our own mirroring triggers and style are by offering insight into the motivations of our Enneagram personality type.

In this article, we’ll explain the meaning of mirroring, analyze how we can identify it, and how it is expressed in each Enneagram type.

Key Takeaways

• Mirroring is a universal social behavior that involves imitating another person’s body language.
• Enneagram and mirroring aren’t directly connected, but the Enneagram test can help us understand our mirroring style and triggers for unhealthy mirroring habits.
• There are different types of mirroring, including nonverbal, emotional, and verbal mirroring.
• Mirroring behavior psychology is rooted in the universal human need for connection.

What Is Mirroring In Psychology?

According to the psychological mirroring definition, this behavior refers to imitating another person’s gestures, speech patterns, facial expressions, or emotions. Like the expression suggests, it’s as if one person behaves like a mirror to the other.

The primary role of mirroring is to build a connection. It’s an integral part of the attachment process between a parent and a child. Its original purpose is to enhance the emotional bond and attunement between the caregiver and the baby. In an ideal situation, a parent adequately mirrors and responds to the child’s emotions.

As the child grows, they mirror back the feelings, gestures, and behaviors of the parent, thus forming their identity. When there’s a lack or a surplus of mirroring, a child may develop some insecure attachment types. In that way, mirroring shapes our sense of self, communication style, and relationships with others.

In adulthood, we may use mirroring consciously, although naturally it begins as an unconscious process. For example, some Enneagram types mirror spontaneously to connect, others to avoid conflict, and some even use it strategically to manipulate others and achieve their goals.

Types of Mirroring

Mirroring comes in different forms, and here are some of the most essential ones:

• Verbal mirroring is when you mimic another person’s tone of voice, speed of speech, verbal pattern, accent, or slang. It is particularly common in social groups and peer interactions, such as among teenagers. When you repeat another person’s phrases in your speech or use their accent in a conversation with them, you’re actually mirroring the other person verbally.
• Emotional mirroring is closely tied to the development of empathy, as it implies intuitive understanding and matching how another person feels. A good example of emotional mirroring is when you get excited because the other person shows excitement.
• Nonverbal mirroring includes imitating another person's body language, facial expressions, posture, and gestures. For instance, when learning a new dance routine, you will use a lot of nonverbal mirroring in a dance class.

6 Positive Aspects of Mirroring

Mirroring has plenty of benefits and is crucial to developing self-awareness. Here are some of its most positive aspects:

#1. Building Rapport and Empathy

When we mirror the other person, they subconsciously feel validated and understood. On the other hand, when our behavior or emotions are reflected, we feel safe, seen, and heard. This nonverbal synchronization subtly builds a deeper emotional bond, fostering rapport and empathy.

#2. Improving Connection and Communication

Carmichael, C.L., and Mizrahi, M. have thoroughly explained the importance of nonverbal communication in their study about the role of nonverbal cues in perceived responsiveness. According to this study, facial expressions, vocal tone, touch, and body language are essential in communicating understanding, validation, and care.

Since mirroring primarily develops as a form of non-verbal communication, understanding how it works and how we can use it can immensely help improve connection and communication.

#3. Enhancing Adaptation Skills

Socially intelligent individuals often subconsciously use mirroring in new environments to be accepted by the new community, establish specific status, or connect with selected people. Observing and reflecting on others’ behaviors helps fit in and reduce social friction.

Thus, the adaptability enabled by mirroring can hugely contribute to successful networking and collaboration.

#4. Fostering Intrapersonal Awareness and Growth

Practicing mirroring consciously can be an excellent tool for fostering intrapersonal awareness and psychological growth.

Mirroring inspires us to observe others more carefully, cultivate intuition, and become more aware of our behaviors, communication style, gestures, and nonverbal cues. This way, we can improve our emotional intelligence and adapt our reactions in various situations.

#5. Enhancing Emotional Intimacy

Mirroring is particularly important in personal relationships, as they require a lot of synchronization between partners. Partners who mirror each other build emotional intimacy more efficiently, even when their verbal communication isn’t on an exceptionally high level.

That’s because their mutual attunement strengthens their bond and allows them to understand each other even when they don’t transparently express their feelings. In addition, mirroring has this kind of effect in both romantic and friendship connections.

#6. Facilitating Learning Skills

Mirroring is a popular learning tool in professional and educational settings because it is incredibly effective at acquiring skills.

Moreover, because mirroring is essentially learning by imitation, it serves as the foundation for many learning and teaching techniques.

Its most obvious application is in early childhood development, where children learn language, sports, and other skills primarily through imitation.

Negative Aspects of Mirroring

Although it is an inherent and universal human ability, mirroring can still have some negative aspects. The most important ones are:

#1. Loss of Authenticity and Self-Identity

Highly sensitive individuals and children who grew up in families where they were subtly or directly encouraged to cater to others’ needs may use mirroring excessively. Consequently, they may lose connection with their authentic selves, affecting their sense of identity and making it harder for them to express their individuality.

#2. Mirroring Action Instead of Intention

Some people may be good at mimicking others’ behaviors but bad at matching their emotions and intentions. Sport is a great way to illustrate this. For example, if one player gets ready to throw the ball, the other should mirror their intention, meaning prepare to catch it.

However, if the other player is mirroring only the behavior, they will adjust their body also to throw, and most likely fail to catch the ball. So, when mirroring isn’t adequate, misunderstandings easily happen in communication.

#3. Deception and Manipulation

Getting other people’s trust is essential for manipulation and deception. Since mirroring inspires others to trust us subconsciously, people with manipulative tendencies can consciously use it to get others on board with their goals. When used in this context, mirroring undermines instead of enhancing genuine connections.

#4. Overdependence on External Validation

In some individuals, mirroring can contribute to people-pleasing patterns and lead to excessive reliance on others’ approval in personal relationships.

When self-confidence and self-worth are low, mirroring is likely to be used to blend in and avoid rejection. This way, mirroring becomes a coping mechanism instead of a tool for building genuine bonds.

As a consequence, it may lead to emotional exhaustion and weakening of personal boundaries.

How to Identify and Manage Mirroring Tendencies

Mirroring is a natural, unconscious process, and for many people it remains unconscious throughout their lives. In healthy individuals, not affected by childhood trauma or similar experiences that can hinder personal growth, it may remain unconscious without causing any negative consequences.

However, it is essential to become aware of mirroring in people who have gone through challenging experiences, especially in personal relationships. Moreover, everyone can benefit from identifying and managing their mirroring tendencies because practicing it consciously can positively impact our relationships in all areas of life.

So, with this in mind, here are some strategies on how to recognize and manage mirroring tendencies:

#1. Self-Reflection and Mirroring

When you notice that you’re mirroring others, it is essential that you understand what motivates you to behave in such a way. So, the key is to reflect on your interactions and ask yourself the right questions, such as:

• Am I feeling energized or exhausted after interacting with specific people? Feeling exhausted may indicate you’re betraying yourself to blend in, while feeling energized may mean you’ve truly connected with others.
• Would a lack of mirroring in specific situations lead to a conflict? If you think it would, you might be using mirroring to avoid confrontation.
• Do I find it hard to remember or express my own preferences in specific situations? If that’s the case, you’re using mirroring as a people-pleasing strategy.

#2. Balancing Mirroring and Authenticity

When you can identify your mirroring patterns and distinguish between healthy and unhealthy ones, you can do the following to balance mirroring and authenticity and support your personal growth:

• Practice assertive communication: learn how to express differing attitudes politely.
• Strengthen your personal boundaries: reflect on your core values and analyze how much your behavior aligns with them.
• Focus on mirroring intentions, not actions. This way, you will ensure attunement.
• Pause before responding. If you’re not sure about something, give yourself time to remember or come to a conclusion about the issue at hand.

Mirroring and the Enneagram: How Each Type Mirrors Others

Each Enneagram personality type has their unique mirroring style, in line with their core motivation, relational needs, cultural influences, and upbringing. Nevertheless, bear in mind that having a pronounced Enneagram wing can significantly modify the expression of your core type’s traits, thus changing your mirroring style too.

So, here’s a brief description of the mirroring in personality types according to the Enneagram test:

Enneagram 1—The Perfectionist

Ones are action-oriented, so they are likely to mirror other people’s behavior, rather than emotions. This is especially true in cases when they admire someone and see them as an example of moral purity to which they aspire.

As children, they take after the parent whom they see as a leader, and as adults, they may mirror their teachers, managers, or other figures of authority who demonstrate the strength of character and ethical standards they were raised with.

Enneagram 2—The Helper

The intuitive Twos are like sponges; they pick up others’ emotions intuitively, especially as kids. So, they are typically the masters of emotional mirroring, which is why they are the best at comforting and supporting other people.

Naturally, since emotional mirroring comes hand in hand with compassion, Twos are one of the biggest empaths of the Enneagram. Nevertheless, since they are also highly sensitive, they may also experience the negative side of mirroring, like enhanced people-pleasing patterns and avoidance of conflict.

Enneagram 3—The Achiever

Threes’ core motivation is to succeed in everything they do at all costs, so they imitate those people whom they perceive as winners. Their mirroring ability is highly developed in all aspects, emotional, behavioral, and nonverbal. As a result, they are social chameleons who easily blend in, assert their influence, and establish connections.

Furthermore, they are highly prone to following social and fashion trends because they intuitively understand how important these are for achieving the desired status and image, both of which are high on their priority list.

Enneagram 4—The Individualist

Individualists are most likely to mirror other people's emotions and trends in the areas they are interested in, like art, music, or poetry.

In addition, they are susceptible to others’ feelings. However, despite highly developed compassion, they don’t feel the urge to comfort others like Twos do, because their core motivation revolves around being unique, not helping others.

Enneagram 5—The Investigator

Fives may mirror the behavior and intellectual tendencies of people they admire. However, they are generally one of the Enneagram types who are the least prone to mirroring. The only area where they will likely use it abundantly is for learning purposes.

If imitation is part of some learning process, they will engage fully; otherwise, nothing inspires them to mirror others since they aren’t particularly interested in connecting or blending in.

Their social and emotional intelligence is usually not highly developed since they overemphasize the importance of intellect. As a result, they rarely mirror others in their daily lives, and when they do, it is unconsciously.

Enneagram 6— The Loyalist

Loyalists are highly prone to mirroring others because they are motivated by the need to belong to their community, and fitting in is essential for them. Since they like having a leader, they are particularly inclined to match the emotional needs and demands of the authority figures in their environment, like their parents, teachers, or bosses.

Though their emotional intelligence is solid and their mirroring ability high, thanks to their lack of self-confidence, they are more likely to use their skills to please others than to form genuine connections.

Enneagram 7—The Enthusiast

Sevens spontaneously mirror whatever makes them feel good, from people to trends and everything in between. They are playful, curious, and energetic like children, and their ability to mirror is as strong as it is naturally in kids.

However, they are also prone to avoiding unpleasant experiences, so they will avoid mirroring the negative emotional states of others, like sorrow, anger, or fear, which may result in them being perceived as lacking compassion.

Nevertheless, thanks to their inherently strong mirroring ability, Enthusiasts are one of the fastest learners of the Enneagram.

Enneagram 8—The Challenger

Motivated by the need to acquire power over others, Eightsmay use mirroring for manipulation purposes. Furthermore, similarly to Threes, they may also mirror the behavior of people whom they see as good examples of the goals they want to achieve. They are also good at matching other people’s emotions, but only when such alignment serves their purposes.

For this reason, since they are capable of all types of mirroring and are usually aware of when they are using it and when it can benefit them, they make good leaders who easily attract followers and collaborators.

Enneagram 9—The Peacemaker

Nines are motivated by the desire for a peaceful, harmonious environment and connection with others. Therefore, they are prone to emotional mirroring and intuitively respond to others’ needs with the goal of preventing disruption in the environment or their relationship with someone.

As a result, they may develop people-pleasing patterns, avoid conflict, and, in extreme cases, lose their identity due to excessive mirroring.

Discover Your Mirroring Style!

Curious to learn how your Enneagram type and mirroring are connected? Take our free Enneagram test and find out now!

Final Thoughts

By studying Enneagram types and mirroring patterns, we gain a deeper understanding of our behavior and relational needs. Nevertheless, belonging to a specific Enneagram type doesn’t define your mirroring capacity in any way, as the biggest indicator of this ability is the quality of your primary attachment with your caregivers.

Finally, the Enneagram test and theory can be used as a powerful framework that helps you become more aware of your mirroring style and as a tool that supports your personal growth by enhancing your self-awareness.

What is Mirroring FAQ